Girls Can't Make Gun Noises

by Paul Surridge

Four words easily describe this novel: laugh-out-loud-funny. Set in the South Wales Valleys in the 1970s, it’s a real tonic for the stresses of every-day life in today's world. Written in the authentic voice of young Gwyn, and crammed with topical references and popular culture, it delivers a real nostalgia trip back to the decade of the Bionic Man and Hawaii Five-O, through the eyes of a six-year-old. Pure indulgence.


There was a loud scream from the back of the shop. Louder than when Pam thought she saw a rat, but it was only some brown wool. But I knew why Pam was screaming this time. Pam came back into the shop, her face was all red and her eyes were bulging like the man who got strangled on Hawaii Five-O.
'What's wrong, Pam?' asked Mam, 'Not another rat is it?'
'It's Gwyn, he's gone and un' done a solid in the bucket! And he's wiped his arse on one of my carpet samples!' shouted Pam, her face more purple than Mr. Gould's.
I couldn't help it. After I'd finished my wee, my belly did a big rumble and I did a big fart. My tummy started to feel funny and I needed to do a number two.


A Touch of Daniel by Peter Tinniswood
Becoming Nancy by Terry Ronald

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