A Guide to the Perplexed

by Gilad Atzmon

This guide, if you are already perplexed, will thicken the mist. A raunchy life story, a very controversial view of Israeli politics and a look at the ridiculous in academia - this tale wizzes through it all. Expect some laugh out loud bits that you will not want to read in a public place.


Margarita, my first steady girlfriend in Germany, was of the inflatable variety. Inflatable loves have advantages that are not to be dismissed out of hand. As I did a lot of travelling in those days, from capital to capital, from hotel to guesthouse, from train to plane, it was very convenient carrying my loved one around with me, deflated and neatly folded in a suitcase. Beside which, my doll Margarita was exceptionally amenable. I never found myself trailing along behind her, weighed down by heavy bags in the course of an interminable shopping expedition.
Translated by Philip Simpson


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