Yellow Dog

Martin Amis

Will Xan Meo stay true to his wish to be a 'new' man - or will thousands of years of caveman conditioning prevail? The England of Martin Amis's blackly comic parallel universe is frighteningly recognisable and I'm very glad I visited it. Though I certainly hope we aren't going to have to live there.

Extract

'Charlton? They're crap.'
'Car's crap. So's Charlton. He's crap and they're crap.'
'Car's crap. But Charlton aren't that crap.'
'Bullshit. They're less crap than he is but they're still crap.'
'Boys, boys: you've got to learn some new swearwords. Take crap, say. I mean bullshit actually means something. Something fairly complicated. Something like: rubbish intended to deceive. But crap? Crap just means crap. As a word, crap is so crap.'
'That's the whole point of it. Crap's wicked.'

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