Alfred Day - a young man caught up in conflict. A sort of cross between the Good Soldier Svejk and Oedipus, with a dash of Dad's Army. And that's not to mention the rest of his crew, who have escaped from - who knows? But they are all completely bonkers. And then there's Joyce, with whom he has a not so brief encounter.
There is nothing quite like this book, so if you're up for a reading adventure, give it a go.
'Tea, I was thinking of tea.' Tea and toast - the operational diet. Tea without end and toast. 'Tea the drink. Not the meal. Tea's not really a meal you'd ever eat, is it? It would be dinner to you, or supper?' He's left the milk right by the stove and it's turned with the heat - only bloody place where there is any heat in the shop.